First Week of Survival

With one week under my belt as a mother of 2, all I can say is that this has been both the most amazing week ever, and most exhausting. I knew that having 2 kids close in age (16 months apart) that I would have my hands full. Boy, was I right! :)

As many of you know, Little Ethan had some issues in the hospital that continued at home with his blood sugar and eating. In the hospital he had to have an IV inserted, which was miserable to watch your child go through. There was a lot of pressure on how much he was eating to keep those numbers up. So, as a mother who was determine to breast feed, this pressure built and built. The first few days were an emotional roller coaster for me, with one day being great, and the next having struggles again. I found myself in tears many times even before we left the hospital. But, by the time we left, we thought we were in the clear with his eating. Little did we know what was to come later that day and the next.

I write this for all you moms out there who can totally relate to the struggles and joys of breast feeding. I have such a strong passion to do it for many reasons. One- it is very healthy for the baby. Two- it is such a great bonding time for mommy and child. And Three- it is SO MUCH CHEAPER! We were given a paper in the hospital that said on average you spend over $1600 in just one year for formula for one baby. THAT IS NUTS when we have a FREE option! :) So, this is for those of you who need a good laugh!

Sunday when we got home from the hospital, my mom was here as well helping around the house and with the transition. Needless to say, my milk had come in the day before, so I felt like I weighed 20 lbs. more!! I seriously thought I could fall over, top heavy. :) So, with this being said, I was excited when Ethan would act hungry because I needed some relief. HOWEVER, his eating struggles continued as he wouldn't latch and therefore I was filling up like a balloon just waiting for someone to pop me! Early evening came and I was in so much discomfort, as well as feeling the stress of getting him to eat. I went up to our bedroom (while other visitors came to see Ethan) and tried to pump with our TERRIBLE pump we had for Payton. We were too cheap with her that we didn't invest in a nice pump. It made it through with her, but I quickly saw that it was not going to do the trick with Ethan. In about 20-30 mins. of trying to pump, all while balling because of frustration, I pumped MAYBE an ounce. My mom came up to the room to comfort me, and thank the Lord she did. We ended up laughing about the whole thing, as she just felt SO BAD for the discomfort I was in. And for some reason, as I pumped one side, the other side would flow like there was NO tomorrow! And that was PRECIOUS milk since I wasn't getting much out, so let's just say my mom had to "assist" me with a bottle on the other side, trying to catch any precious drip!! As if that wasn't a sight to see in and of itself, she dropped the precious 5 drips that was in the bottle all over my pants. Kyle walked in to check on me just as this was happening and witnessed two VERY giddy women who were frustrated, tired, and laughing hysterically!! Little did he know what he got himself into for the next two days of us! :) (Thanks for trying mom- seriously, mom's will do ANYTHING, and I mean ANYTHING for their children!) :)

Just then we remembered that we were given a nice pump from a dear family to use this time around. However, we hadn't looked at it, cleaned it, or tried to put it together. Kyle knew from the look on my face that it was time to get it figured out. Bless his heart, he got it all figured out without instructions and got it all hooked up for me. I knew I had to have some relief, and with Ethan still not latching, I knew I at least needed to get some for bottles for the night. So, we attempted with the new pump. Kyle got QUITE the kick out of this process, as I was able to do both sides at once. Let's just say, again, when you need relief and need it BAD, you just don't care what you look like or who might see. So, Kyle and my mom helped as I was able to get a few ounces out. Enough for a little relief and for the evening bottles. THANK GOODNESS!

Then came Monday. About midmorning, I was feeling the discomfort once again and knew I needed to try again to pump for some relief because Ethan still wasn't latching. So, Kyle got it all set up before he left for basketball practice and mom helped with the kids as I started the process. Let me just tell you...I have not been more impressed with my body before! ha! Let's just say "my girls" were CHAMPS! The flood gates opened and I was finally able to reap the benefits! The milk just started coming and therefore, I just kept pumping. Each bottle was a 5 ounce bottle, and my mom was on standby with replacements! haha! We laughed SO HARD as I was able to pump 15 ounces, YES 15 OUNCES, in ONE SITTING!!!!!!!!!!! Way to go girls!!!!!! Let's just say, Kyle was INCREDIBLY sad that he missed this joyous occasion! Ha! Once again, thank you mom for helping me "collect" for the day. I seriously felt like a cow being milked for the day, and I sure produced that day! :)

The rest of that day Ethan started to latch!!! We believe it all came because I wasn't as full- too full made it hard for him to latch on to anything, so thank goodness for relief! Although he was able to latch, now he got OVERLY excited about this I think and I got VERY sore VERY fast. This brought the next frustration as I would cry in pain each time he ate. HOWEVER, I was so determined to breast feed him that I was willing to take the pain. I was so glad he was finally eating and didn't have to worry about his sugar levels, so I was willing to do ANYTHING!

That brings us to today. I think we MIGHT, just might have this whole eating thing down. Ethan is consistently eating and Mommy is starting to deal with the pain better, with is getting less and less. So, it is a good day.

I love the time I have with my little boy, time that only I get to have. I love that, even when we have visitors and they all want to hold him, I am always the one he comes back to to meet his needs. To all of you moms out there that are dealing with what I am dealing with, can relate to past stories, or are contemplating whether to breast or bottle feed, let me just encourage you. If anyone ever tells you that breast feeding is easy, they are not telling you the truth. I can honestly say it is hard, VERY hard at times. It takes a lot of work, you will get frustrated, and it might hurt. BUT-it doesn't last forever! I wouldn't trade what I have gone through in the last week for the chance to meet this need for my child. Trust me, if I can do it, ANYONE can! So, be encouraged, and keep on keeping on moms out there! You can do it!! :)